Originally posted by: colorado815 on 6/20/2007 11:07:14 AM

>Two Women Talking In Heaven:
>
>1st woman: Hi! My name is Wanda.
>
>2nd woman: Hi! I 'm Sylvia. How'd you die?
>
>1st woman: I froze to death.
>
>2nd woman: How horrible!
>
>1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began
>to get warm and sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you?
>
>2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband
>was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead,
>I found him all by himself in the den watching TV.
>
>1st woman: So, what happened?
>
>2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I
>started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and
>searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet
>and checked under all the beds . I kept this up until I had looked
>everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over
>with a heart attack and died.
>
>1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer........ we'd both
>still be alive today

Originally posted by: colorado815 on 6/20/2007 11:09:48 AM

How do you get there from here?

Originally posted by: Camaro 69 on 6/20/2007 12:38:09 PM

A couple had been debating buying a vehicle for weeks.
He wanted a truck; she wanted a fast little sports car so she could zip through traffic around town.
He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.
“Look!” she said. “I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in just a few seconds. Nothing else will do. My birthday is coming up so surprise me!”
He did just that. For her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.
Nobody has seen or heard from him since.